British psychologist John Bowlby was the first attachment theorist. He described attachment as a "lasting psychological connectedness between human beings." Bowlby was interested in understanding the anxiety and distress that children experience when separated from their primary caregivers (Cherry, 2023).
Are You Trading Authenticity for Attachment?
I felt this uncomfortable sensation in my body. I found myself striving yet resisting at the same time. The resistance I felt internally was my body actively trying to pull back from that striving. That resistance was my authenticity. At that moment, I was around people who were not a part of my tribe, and it was very hard for me to relate to them. I felt my primitive brain trying to strive to fit in for survival. Exclusion can feel like a survival level threat, and the pain from that experience can feel physical — so of course my body was fighting to avoid that pain. I then checked in with my body, and I felt myself needing a good talk with someone who I felt who got what I was experiencing. I needed some advice. I needed someone to help remove the discomfort. The more I sat with the emotion, I recognized I needed to connect with myself. No one would know how to interpret my feelings in that moment better than me. What was that anxious feeling trying to express to me? I then reached into my Resilience Toolkit and pulled out the Insight Timer app from my phone. Upon scrolling, I noticed the track, “The Power of Inclusion and Authenticity” by Lynn Fraser Stillpoint. Within 5 mins, I felt my body take a deep breath. My body felt understood.