“The inner child is a “part” of our personality that stores all our memories, feelings, needs, reactions, attitudes towards ourselves and others, and behaviors that we have preserved from our childhood.” – Katya Ki

Some people think that reflecting on childhood memories and emotions is not helpful, but others see it as a way of letting go of the past and healing. Reflecting on childhood memories for some allows a person a sense of freedom. Freedom from repeating the past and freedom to break free of dysfunctional patterns they witnessed growing up within their own families. 

Allowing yourself the freedom to create a new future and to let go of the past is where reparenting your inner child comes into play in counseling. Reparenting is recommended by some counselors, social workers, support groups, and therapists as a process of healing. In the therapy profession, reparenting is when a therapist steps into the role of a parent so the client can begin to visualize and process what a healthy, trusting parent-child relationship looks like. Through this role play, the client can begin to work through and repair their past and unhealthy patterns that were learned through the relationship with their own parents and begin to improve their future for themselves and their own families. Reparenting allows the client to channel their inner child, as an adult, and return to a time in their life or memories where they were wronged by a parent and in the process, the now adult, is able to heal their inner child and heal from defective parenting.

Growing up in an emotionally unstable or dysfunctional family unit can have lasting effects on an individual’s mental health and the pattern of dysfunction can continue to the individual’s future family. Reparenting has been introduced to stop the cycle and repair the damage so that the individual can become an emotional healthy adult and parent. Reparenting shows that it is never too late to learn important skills that were not taught at an early age through a person’s parents or role models. 

True reparenting is recommended to be practiced with a professional but there are some self-help reparenting tips that can be useful. You can begin by channeling your inner child and stating some positive affirmations about yourself, reflect on what kind of parent you want to be, take steps to learn skills and tips to be the type of parent you want to be, practice self-care, honor your feelings but allow yourself to forgive, find your joy in life. Reparenting does involve a mental shift which can be tough. Finding strength to allow yourself to move from a victim state to a power state takes effort but you are worthy of that, and you are worthy of this step of self-healing.